RESEARCH_FILE
Abdullah Almaatouq
MIT Media Lab (at publication); later MIT Sloan School of Management
Known for:Showing that only about half of perceived friendships are mutual, and that this misperception limits social influence
SEE THE PRACTICE
Turn a thought this research explains into one clear move.
THE THOUGHT
“I'm everyone's therapist and no one's friend”
YOUR RECORDED RESPONSE
“I'm a friend, not a service.”
ONE PRIVATE MOVE
For the next 5 minutes, open a blank note and list three things you would normally leave unsaid because they are not useful to anyone else. Do not send it. Just leave the note open on the screen.
Key findings
- 2016
In self-reported friendship surveys, participants expected the vast majority of their friendships to be reciprocal, yet only about 53% actually were — consistent with earlier studies finding reciprocity rates of 34–53% — revealing a profound inability to perceive friendship reciprocity. Are You Your Friends' Friend? Poor Perception of Friendship Ties Limits the Ability to Promote Behavioral Change ↗
- 2016
In a fitness intervention, peer pressure from reciprocal friendships drove significantly more behavior change than pressure from one-sided ties — the asymmetry people can't see has practical consequences for who can actually influence whom. Are You Your Friends' Friend? Poor Perception of Friendship Ties Limits the Ability to Promote Behavioral Change ↗