QUIET
Quiet signal
“My child changed all my friendships” appears, but it rarely gets the final say. Keep this line available for higher-pressure moments: “Half the network shrinks for every new parent. This is a tide, not a judgment about me.”
SCRIPT CHECK · 60 SECONDS
“My child changed all my friendships”
See what this thought is changing.
Five quick questions show how often it appears, how believable it feels, and what it makes you avoid. You’ll get one private next step.
What this self-check measures
This is not a diagnosis and there is no pass or fail. It measures the current frequency, credibility, and behavioral cost of “My child changed all my friendships”, including the private rule underneath it: If my friends don't invite me, it means they've decided I'm gone. If I don't ask first, I can't be rejected. Being left out is proof I was right to protect myself by disappearing first.
See all result bands
PRESENT
Present in the background
“My child changed all my friendships” wins some small decisions before you catch it. Your useful interruption is: “The friends I haven't heard from are not gone—they're waiting for me to send the opening.”
ACTIVE
Active pattern
“My child changed all my friendships” is shaping action often enough to deserve a deliberate counterexample. Start privately and concretely: Write down the next free afternoon or evening you have available. Do not send it anywhere. Just write it—date, time, who it could fit. Notice whether you actually knew you had that space, or only now that you've written it down.
DOMINANT
Getting the final word
Right now, “My child changed all my friendships” is steering many of the moments you measured. That is a pattern reading, not a diagnosis or character verdict. Begin with one reversible receipt: Write down the next free afternoon or evening you have available. Do not send it anywhere. Just write it—date, time, who it could fit. Notice whether you actually knew you had that space, or only now that you've written it down.