SCRIPT CHECK · 60 SECONDS
Five quick questions show how often it appears, how believable it feels, and what it makes you avoid. You’ll get one private next step.
This is not a diagnosis and there is no pass or fail. It measures the current frequency, credibility, and behavioral cost of “I feel like their emergency contact, not their sibling”, including the private rule underneath it: If they only contact me when something is broken, I must be the person on standby, not the person they actually know. Their gaps, their urgency, and their habit of coming back only in trouble start to feel like proof that I matter only…
QUIET
“I feel like their emergency contact, not their sibling” appears, but it rarely gets the final say. Keep this line available for higher-pressure moments: “Their silence between problems tells me how they handle closeness, not who I am.”
PRESENT
“I feel like their emergency contact, not their sibling” wins some small decisions before you catch it. Your useful interruption is: “I can notice the pattern without pretending it feels fair.”
ACTIVE
“I feel like their emergency contact, not their sibling” is shaping action often enough to deserve a deliberate counterexample. Start privately and concretely: Open your notes app and make two short lists: “What they call for” and “What it costs me.” Add one example to each, then close the app without sending anything.
DOMINANT
Right now, “I feel like their emergency contact, not their sibling” is steering many of the moments you measured. That is a pattern reading, not a diagnosis or character verdict. Begin with one reversible receipt: Open your notes app and make two short lists: “What they call for” and “What it costs me.” Add one example to each, then close the app without sending anything.